HOW TO BE A 'GOVONOZ' WIFE

 HOW TO BE A 'GOVONOZ' WIFE.

In the month that just passed, at least two 'govonoz' wives were privileged to have me in their audience.
<conceit, conceit hehehe>.
It struck me how many similarities there were between them and this is my hypothesis for all the requirements needed for anyone to be the wife of a 'govono'. Oh and of course, I added my own jara.


1. Wear Ankara for public outings<...and most importantly DO NOT forget your headgear>

This is because you do not want your audience to think you have been poisoned by western civilization, if not tufiakwa!

2. Bow in modesty while your citation is being read.

Widen your eyes in surprise too as if you are hearing those things about yourself for the first time.
As if you did not ask your PA to bring it for review more than 15 times.

3. Speak queen's English.
Speak nicely and fluently. You do not want your audience to think that you are not educated do you now?
Also, make sure your speech is slow<not in a retarded way, just enough to give your audience time enough to appreciate how much of a great orator you are> and DO NOT RAISE YOUR VOICE!
Keep the volume down<I don't know why, but I think it's a classy women thing>

4. Make reference to your husband's achievements.
He is the governor after all is he not? Be sure to say something nice. Everybody loves a responsible woman that lifts the name of her husband on high.

5. Avoid any deviation from the topic you were asked to speak on, no matter how important it is.
Tell your audience instead that they should quit being cry babies, that they should learn to fend for themselves. Tell them not to run away, that even if they ran, what about the people they would leave behind? Tell them that by God's grace, the nation would be great again one day.

6. Be super pretty.

7. Be super super pretty.

8. Be super super super pretty.

9. Call yourself a mother. 

Tell your audience that you are like a mother to them, no matter what their ages are, because that is one of the things that being a "govonoz" wife makes you become.

10. After you have addressed your audience, leave gracefully, with a smile.

 If it was a program you attended, don't wait till it is over to leave the venue, leave right in the middle as long as you have said what you have to say. Take note of the people on the high table that do not stand to 'escort' you out, write their names down and report them to your husband.



Thank you.




Yes, always say thank you at the end of your speech.
<hehe>





Author's note:
I love powerful women. LOVE.
I want to be one of them someday and to be honest, my ambitions scare me.
Anywayyyy aren't I just a sweetheart, I just gave out 10 huge tips for free! You are welcome.


Meanwhileeeee, *drum roll please*

I have done a thing! 

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