***trigger warning for sexual abuse.
I.
When our good girl held the camera, all her senses became aware that she was holding a camera. She adjusted her blouse first to be sure that everything that should be covered was covered, then, she focused the camera on her face, just her face.
II
Our good girl smiled at the camera and twisted her head sideways to show her dimple, God's own beautiful design. She didn't use makeup, what for? Using makeup according to her father was like spitting on God.
It was a "tueh! You could have done a better job on my face", so our good girl didn't use it.
She only used a little lip gloss once in a while.
A little. Not enough to shimmer and shine.
Very glossy lips were for the adulterers, the ones that wanted to seduce men into their beds, her father would say.
Our good girl didn't want to be a delilah, an object of distraction, and on that day, she had nothing on her lips.
III
To show her outfit, she'd put her phone on her makeshift tripod, and stood farther away, never taking her eyes off the camera, then she tucked her shirt into her skirt and dragged it down to make sure the hem kissed her knee.
<she would have done the same thing if she had on a dress sha, and that one too gets a good dragging down. She would never wear trousers. A good girl? Wear an apparel for the other gender? God forbid!>
III
She would admire lipstick sometimes but it never went past admiration. Good girls didn't use lipstick. Her mother had already told her that lipsticks were made from mermaid fins in the marine world for Satan to trap the souls of foolish women. No, she never imagined using them.
IV
The good girl was pleased with how she looked so she decided to make a video, first turning around to show the design of her outfit at the back, her kíkò remaining rigid on her head.
<of course, a good girl has a list of acceptable hair do, she doesn't attach anything to her hair, except it is wool—Jesus accepts wool because his clothes while he was on Earth were made of wool, or it is thread, kíkò—Jesus accepts that one too, there is no clear explanation but her mother says that is how it has always been>
Mid-way through her turn around, she stopped. She had seen the contour of her body from the side view and even she was mesmerised, but, she could not let the camera capture her like that. Showing curves was a sin. What if the other brethren saw it and it led them into temptation?
Our good girl charged at her camera and deleted the video. The turning around was a bad idea.
V
Our good girl sat down and looked at all the pictures she had taken, she wanted to post a few of them on Facebook.
She thought hard for a suitable caption.
First, she typed "praying and slaying", then she deleted it, it sounded too lukewarm. Then she tried, "#jesusbaby #whodeybreet #jesusbeauty", then she deleted it too. She thought to herself to use a caption that would edify the viewer, so she settled for a bible verse. She took a deep breath and pressed "send".
***********
VI
Our good girl was sad, it had been 5 hours and she had only gotten 6 likes. She was worried, even Bro. T had not liked her pictures yet, but he left a comment on Sis. Charity's that was posted two minutes ago. Was her photo not good enough? Or was it the caption?
VI
Our good girl was sad, it had been 5 hours and she had only gotten 6 likes. She was worried, even Bro. T had not liked her pictures yet, but he left a comment on Sis. Charity's that was posted two minutes ago. Was her photo not good enough? Or was it the caption?
************
VII
12 hours...8 likes. No comment.
VII
12 hours...8 likes. No comment.
************
VIII
Our good girl took down the photo the next day. She felt miserable nonetheless. All the other girls had 46 comments, 79likes, 100 likes, 50 comments, and so and so.
Infact, Tonia from school had 200 likes on her post the week before! She had uploaded a photo of herself standing in front of a restaurant with a red mini dress on and really nice makeup. Was that it? The good girl was wondering.
VIII
Our good girl took down the photo the next day. She felt miserable nonetheless. All the other girls had 46 comments, 79likes, 100 likes, 50 comments, and so and so.
Infact, Tonia from school had 200 likes on her post the week before! She had uploaded a photo of herself standing in front of a restaurant with a red mini dress on and really nice makeup. Was that it? The good girl was wondering.
***********
IX
Our good girl felt very sad. Was it not sinful to be sad over a thing as worldly as Facebook? Our good girl felt guilty for her sadness and she really wanted to talk to someone, so she waited till sunday to talk to her Sunday School teacher(she couldn't tell any of her parents because they were strongly against Facebook and only gave her permission to use it to share the gospel).
IX
Our good girl felt very sad. Was it not sinful to be sad over a thing as worldly as Facebook? Our good girl felt guilty for her sadness and she really wanted to talk to someone, so she waited till sunday to talk to her Sunday School teacher(she couldn't tell any of her parents because they were strongly against Facebook and only gave her permission to use it to share the gospel).
***********
IXb
Her Sunday school teacher, after listening to her ordeal had told her that she should visit him during the week. He said to not worry, it was not a serious matter, that her camera was the problem and he would help her take pictures with his iPhone so that she would get more likes and comments.
X
Our good girl was happy and relieved. She could barely wait for Saturday to come when she'd pay her sunday school teacher a visit before choir practice without her parents noticing (they do not let her out of the house except to go to school or church).
IXb
Her Sunday school teacher, after listening to her ordeal had told her that she should visit him during the week. He said to not worry, it was not a serious matter, that her camera was the problem and he would help her take pictures with his iPhone so that she would get more likes and comments.
X
Our good girl was happy and relieved. She could barely wait for Saturday to come when she'd pay her sunday school teacher a visit before choir practice without her parents noticing (they do not let her out of the house except to go to school or church).
****************
XI
It was a rainy Saturday evening and our good girl had just been welcomed into the sunday school teacher's home. This was her first time of visiting alone, all the other times she had been there, she had gone with the other girls from church.
It was a beautiful self contained apartment.
There was a kitchen, a bathroom and a room with a bed and a plastic chair.
Our good girl sat on the plastic chair across her Sunday school teacher. He told her to come closer so that he could focus the camera properly. Then he placed his right hand on her left thigh to steady her. She was a bit uncomfortable and he noticed.
He told her to calm down and then asked her to undo a few buttons on her shirt.
XII
"You have to look attractive as a woman so that people will glorify the work of the Lord in your life when you post your photos" was what he said, and when he sensed her hesitation, he offered to help her undo them and she let him. He unbuttoned the first, then the second and then he started to speak in tongues. He asked her to join him in prayers and close her eyes so if you ask, she will tell you that she did not realise when all her buttons were undone and her Sunday school teacher had both hands on her bosom.
XIII
She will tell you that she remembers that he said it was an impartation. He had told her that he was praying for her breasts so that the children that will suckle on her breasts would be great men and women of God.
XI
It was a rainy Saturday evening and our good girl had just been welcomed into the sunday school teacher's home. This was her first time of visiting alone, all the other times she had been there, she had gone with the other girls from church.
It was a beautiful self contained apartment.
There was a kitchen, a bathroom and a room with a bed and a plastic chair.
Our good girl sat on the plastic chair across her Sunday school teacher. He told her to come closer so that he could focus the camera properly. Then he placed his right hand on her left thigh to steady her. She was a bit uncomfortable and he noticed.
He told her to calm down and then asked her to undo a few buttons on her shirt.
XII
"You have to look attractive as a woman so that people will glorify the work of the Lord in your life when you post your photos" was what he said, and when he sensed her hesitation, he offered to help her undo them and she let him. He unbuttoned the first, then the second and then he started to speak in tongues. He asked her to join him in prayers and close her eyes so if you ask, she will tell you that she did not realise when all her buttons were undone and her Sunday school teacher had both hands on her bosom.
XIII
She will tell you that she remembers that he said it was an impartation. He had told her that he was praying for her breasts so that the children that will suckle on her breasts would be great men and women of God.
*************
XIV
If you ask her, she wouldn't tell you more than what I have told you because continuing the story from this point is too painful. She would say that she cannot begin to explain how she begged him to stop, how she tried to scream the house down, how he held her in an iron grip and had his way with her, how he took pictures of her when he was done and asked her not to tell anyone about it or else he would post those pictures on Facebook, how he made her do many other unspeakable things over and over until he left town to go for his pastor's training.
XV
You see, she only told me because I am her lawyer and she is being suspected for the gruesome murder of Pastor Williams Igado, her Sunday school teacher 12 years ago when she was 15years old.
The names in this piece have no relation to ANYONE, LIVING OR DEAD.
Author's note.
When I first wrote this, it was a fun article inspired by my pious christian aunties on all the "good girl" rules, but for some reason as I made edits over and over, it morphed into this.
I have a lot to say about this piece, but that would be a whole other blogpost. I do not mean it as an attack to any group of people however I hope it puts some things in perspective.
I wish our good girl's parents were a lot more accessible. I wish they had given her proper sex education the same way they hammered all the other irrelevant rules into her head. I wish the sunday school teacher wasn't a predator. I wish she had someone to tell her that it was normal to seek validation but she shouldn't let it overwhelm her. I wish she didn't have to confide in the vile man...
There are a lot of wishes. I know this piece might have been a bit triggering for you and I am giving you mega -warm-cyber hugs. I hope and pray that we all get the healing our souls, hearts and bodies crave.
Meanwhileeeee, *drum roll please*
I have done a thing!
Do you enjoy the content on this blog?
Do you want to be a part of the creation process?
www.hernaijamoments.blogspot.com would be revamping soon and I want you to be a part of it!
Become a partner today for just:
5 000NGN 2 000NGN (till 15th December, 2021)
Perks of being a partner from January 2022:
-You get to be on my mailing list
<and get juicy life updates first>
-Every month, you will get polls containing content topics sent to your email and then get to pick what content you want posted next.
<yes, you get to control me>
-Discounts on ads
-Discounts on products during purchase from ads.
-General feeling of happiness and contentment.
Click here:Blog support
XIV
If you ask her, she wouldn't tell you more than what I have told you because continuing the story from this point is too painful. She would say that she cannot begin to explain how she begged him to stop, how she tried to scream the house down, how he held her in an iron grip and had his way with her, how he took pictures of her when he was done and asked her not to tell anyone about it or else he would post those pictures on Facebook, how he made her do many other unspeakable things over and over until he left town to go for his pastor's training.
XV
You see, she only told me because I am her lawyer and she is being suspected for the gruesome murder of Pastor Williams Igado, her Sunday school teacher 12 years ago when she was 15years old.
The names in this piece have no relation to ANYONE, LIVING OR DEAD.
Author's note.
When I first wrote this, it was a fun article inspired by my pious christian aunties on all the "good girl" rules, but for some reason as I made edits over and over, it morphed into this.
I have a lot to say about this piece, but that would be a whole other blogpost. I do not mean it as an attack to any group of people however I hope it puts some things in perspective.
I wish our good girl's parents were a lot more accessible. I wish they had given her proper sex education the same way they hammered all the other irrelevant rules into her head. I wish the sunday school teacher wasn't a predator. I wish she had someone to tell her that it was normal to seek validation but she shouldn't let it overwhelm her. I wish she didn't have to confide in the vile man...
There are a lot of wishes. I know this piece might have been a bit triggering for you and I am giving you mega -warm-cyber hugs. I hope and pray that we all get the healing our souls, hearts and bodies crave.
Meanwhileeeee, *drum roll please*
I have done a thing!
Do you enjoy the content on this blog?
Do you want to be a part of the creation process?
www.hernaijamoments.blogspot.com would be revamping soon and I want you to be a part of it!
Become a partner today for just:
5 000NGN 2 000NGN (till 15th December, 2021)
Perks of being a partner from January 2022:
-You get to be on my mailing list
<and get juicy life updates first>
-Every month, you will get polls containing content topics sent to your email and then get to pick what content you want posted next.
<yes, you get to control me>
-Discounts on ads
-Discounts on products during purchase from ads.
-General feeling of happiness and contentment.
Click here:Blog support
1 Comments
And we see a stark deviation from this in Nigeria, that's why people think one would get to a point and stop needing parents (maybe when you are richer than they are or 'old enough' or parents themselves). That's rubbish. Life's ridiculously difficult and we need support systems. Parents should be the biggest support systems out there, steady pillars so that we don't look for support elsewhere in pillars that are fragile, like the character in your story.